When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
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