awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
He had one of those small greek statue penises
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
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