their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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