im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Randomize
