idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
