and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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