There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize