Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize