It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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