It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize