you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
