my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
as a side note pls kill me
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
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