Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
