can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize
