What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
