Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
