I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize