wrigley field is MILF paradise
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
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