We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
3pm strippers are depressing
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
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