Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Randomize
