The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
