kristin has been a bad kristin
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Terrible idea I love it
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
