I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
