he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize