He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
