can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
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