I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I am one with the molecules
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
