I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Randomize
