Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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