Barsexuality is the new black.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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