i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
We need a shit load of segways right now
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Randomize
