it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
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Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
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His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Damn victory sex feels great
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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