Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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