she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
