she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Four minutes until I can fart!
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
