I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
