Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
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