He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
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90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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