I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
i now understand why vodka
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize