She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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