Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
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