I am puke
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Randomize
