'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
She's the barista slut.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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