Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
