On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
It was a blind-side dick pic.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize
