We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
He did a backflip because drugs
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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