I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
