I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
