So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
