I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Welp...herpes.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize