Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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