Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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