My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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